There are days when I care, days when I’d like to think I don’t care, and days, like today, when I wish I could stop caring. I don’t want to give a fuck about anyone or anything, but instead,
I care too much about stupid politicians and politics. I care too much that idiots are the faces of the politics of the World, of the United States, and of the individual states of the United States. If idiots weren’t in charge, I firmly believe that basic, needed things would be affordable to anyone who works a full time job, or anyone who is retired and has paid into Social Security, or anyone retired or disabled from our military service, or anyone legitimately disabled and unable to work. We, and our children, need basic things: food, clothing, shelter. We need medical, dental, and optical care, and medicine. If selfish idiots weren’t in charge, taxes would pay for services the government is needed for, and infrastructure maintenance, and we wouldn’t need special extra gas taxes, cigarette taxes, liquor taxes, and toll roads. A flat tax paid for consumption or use would be fine, but that should eliminate income tax. Instead, we pay twice for what we should pay once, and someone or some ones in the middle of it are raking in the bucks.
I mentioned yesterday that I’m paying about five times what I borrowed for the house, instead of just paying it back with a reasonable interest rate. And thank God I know about loan types, or we might have gone with an adjustable rate mortgage (A.R.M.- that’s what it costs when the rates are “adjusted.”), or worse, a loan with a balloon payment at the end. It’s bad enough the part of the monthly payment that goes toward reducing the principle is less than 20% of the total payment demanded. My trouble (first world fucking problems!) is that an assessor went through our crap neighborhood last year and decided my house is worth more than I’m paying (translation, tax assessors and other middle-men can get more money out of me), so they raised the taxes on my house to match the value they say it’s now worth. Except I signed an agreement to pay a specified amount for 30 years and now the government and the bank and the tax assessors are in collusion with one another, dicking around with it and saying now I have to pay more than I agreed to pay when we signed the papers, FUCKERS!
If I get a raise, the damned government figures out a way to suck that away before I get to touch it. Raise taxes, reduce benefits, arbitrarily design a “fuck-you, taxpayer” fee I didn’t know I had to pay. Meanwhile certain people who know how to work the system eat better food than I can afford from my job’s wages, and if I make literally a single $1 too much over a six month period, they are going to pull what benefits I DO benefit from out from under me and make me pay full market price for them (insurance), even though that $1 more doesn’t do shit to relieve the burdens that make me grovel and beg for that assistance, because now my house is allegedly worth more. It’s only worth more if I try to sell it, but since I’m still paying for it, it seems to me that it’s worth the same as what it was worth when I started paying for it. The insurance company and the bank and the government want me homeless and helpless and bankrupt, or (actually, “and,”) they don’t want to help. Why the fuck is that?
Buy a tire and you pay for tires, then mounting and balancing, then valve stems, then tire disposal, then alignment, and then, if you’re wise, for a protection plan because roads have potholes and nails and screws and abandoned disintegrated tire “gators,” and other shit left by litterers and road construction crews and whoever else, not to mention the local fauna. Valve stems, really? Like, if you bought a tire it wouldn’t come with fucking valve stems from how they’re manufactured. Disposal, really? Like if I don’t want to take the old tire home with me and throw it in my own trash, I have to pay an extra fee for the tire shop to have a guy throw it in the dumpster out back. I get the other fees, someone has to do mounting, balancing and alignment so the tires will work, and so they’ll last. But there should be a better way to structure that or to bill for that.
A home loan payment shouldn’t be five-plus times the amount of the principle of the loan. That tells me several ass holes are lining their pockets with way too damn much (go ahead, insert meme) of my money and probably a few million other wishful would-be homeowners’ money. Buying feels right though, to finally own something rather than being a renter forever and never having any kind of personal security, or building equity. If you rent, I’m fine with it and I don’t think any less of you. I know good reasons to rent, not the least of which is if you don’t own it you shouldn’t have to shell out cash to fix it under conditions of normal use. Like renting a car, if you just drive it a few days you should only have to put gas in it, not pay to change the oil and pay to rotate and balance new tires for it.
I want a King Solomon for President. Someone who is wise enough to design systems that actually work, that help people, and who is politically savvy enough to not put us on the brink of World War III every time he opens his mouth, and to not try to just hand over the keys of the country to other countries every time she opens her mouth. I want a King Solomon for state governor, who will help people beyond basic needs. We need employment from employers who will pay a fair and decent living wage, and reward loyalty by paying higher-than-entry-fucking-level wages to people who stay with a company. The governor should hire reputable companies to build and maintain the infrastructure of his state, and oversee the other important concerns of his or her constituency. The governor, or his trusted appointees, should be able to step in when a constituent is being treated unfairly.
I want a King Solomon for an employer, who trains and promotes and pays higher wages to those from within, rather than hiring from the outside and paying them the same as what I earn after 10 years and calling that an entry level wage. When I found out that basically unless I made a lot of noise about it they were happy to keep me under everyone’s thumbs, if I were prone to uncontrollable rage, instead of festering, I’d have driven down to corporate with guns, killed a few select people and gotten myself either killed, or earned 3 square meals and a bed, workout facilities, a legal library to study and earn a law degree, and total dependence on the government and my cellmates.
I care too much about my family. If I were a selfish ass hole of a man, I could have earned a divorce years ago, instead of 25 years of marriage. I could tell the courts I’m helpless, find a “sugar momma” to bed, and live off of her excesses and indulgences and leave my ex wife and kids to sink or swim on their own and not pay any child support. Instead I’m home helping with housework and home repair and improvements if I can afford them and school homework and gas money and car maintenance if I know how to do it myself (MUCH cheaper) and working my ass off and praying for college scholarships because I don’t want to work until I’m 150 years old to pay off the debt and usury, adding the extra penalties and fees for not dying soon enough. Because the working poor are supposed to work two and three and more jobs just to survive, and die of heart attacks when they turn 42. I’ve outlived that shit, thankfully, at least so far. But caring is stressful.
I care too much about my neighborhood and local things. Instead of hearing about the latest murder victims, kidnapping victims, rape victims, robbery victims, I want the news to lead with the story they try to close with on a slow day. And I want more news stories like that every day. I want my neighborhood and my city to be shown what can happen when visionary people who aren’t completely heartless ass holes decide to keep trying. But instead I get the other shit, for 28 minutes every morning if I only watch for 30, and then 2 minutes of a veteran who gets to be in a parade and go for a short ride in a nice fancy car because he’s 90-something and someone wanted to do something nice for him before he died.
I want people to be celebrated and be on the news for doing the nice things. Why the fuck do we have 28 out of 30 minutes on the weather, the traffic, the mayhem, and only 2 for the people doing something nice? I can understand 13 on weather and traffic. But do the other 15 have to be wasted on how horrible some people are? Flip that shit and do the opposite. If it’s in the interest of public safety, fine, tell us to lock up our daughters and wives, or tell us the infrastructure is crumbling and we need a new bridge built over the overpass so there will be diverted traffic, fine, report that. But otherwise,
Why can’t we hear about Girl Scout Gold Award winners, Boy Scout Eagle Scout Award Winners, and their service projects? Why don’t we hear about foundations making grants and setting up programs to help retirees make it on their fixed social security and medicare, or churches feeding the hungry and sheltering the homeless, and sending out a small army of people to help seniors and disabled citizens with their house- and yard- work and gutters, washed dishes and laundry, vacuuming, companionship, trips to the local community center or to a nice restaurant for a meal?
Why can’t we hear about the people who got the full-ride scholarship to a local college (, and can those recipient be my daughter and son when they graduate)? Why can’t we hear about how Mrs Mumple has managed to not murder or kick Mr. M to the curb, through 25 years and two children? Why can’t we hear about the mystery generous guy (or lady, I’m not going to give it back because of a gender issue) who just out of the blue decided to hand Deon Mumple a check for a few million dollars with enough extra to pay the tax on that? That hasn’t happened yet, I’m just putting it out there for that person, whomever they are, so they know there’s room over here for their anonymous donation.
I’m quite certain there’s at least 13 minutes of those kinds of stories that could be told, every day, instead of all the guns and evil. Maybe if we celebrated the good, instead, there would be more of that, and less of the shit we glorify on TV EVERY fucking day. Kids looking for role models won’t find them on TV or in the news or media. All they’ll find are idiots, idiot politicians, cheap-ass business tycoons, and criminals, including murderers and robbers and rapists and vandals and other thugs, not that those genres are never cross-populated. And the worst thing about putting those role-models on the television and media is, that THE AIMLESS KIDS ARE FOLLOWING THEIR LEAD.
The way it’s run right now I wish I could just not give a fuck. But alas, I do in fact care, and try to do small things to make it better. I volunteer a little time out of my life whenever I can, or whenever I can figure out how to schedule it even though I don’t think I can, because I can make a tiny difference by showing up to sweat for someone who needs help. Because I care, I wish other people gave a fuck too, instead of the standard issue what’s-in-it-for-me and how-can-I-profit-and-screw-the-other-person’s-welfare that I see in the world, in American politics, and in modern corporate America. I either need enough money so I don’t have to care and then I need to learn the lessons from the above assholes, OR, I need a LOT more people to start giving a fuck about someone other than themselves.
I understand. We’re all under the same shitty management. The old managerial ass holes were all taught the same thing, doesn’t matter which hoity-toity school their dads bought their business or law degrees from. Which means, nobody reading this has shit, unless a bored billionaire is looking for people to condescend to. I’m willing, in exchange for a few million dollars, to be treated with condescension. Go ahead. But if you’re not a bored billionaire looking for a charity case you might only have a few bucks extra here and there. That’s most of the readers out there that I know about. I know you need your not-coffee, but how about buying one less cup of not-coffee from Starbucks, and giving that money to a cause I care way too much about. Click here:
Please. Really. She and her daughter ARE a worthy cause. I may care too much, but until her tiny goal is far surpassed, I feel that not enough support is being shown to these two deserving young ladies. What the hell, if you ARE a bored billionaire, how about giving a few million to Ms. N., instead of me. I’ll be fine, probably. Or, we’re both willing to accept donations if you’ve got it like that. But we both need enough for it to be an actual blessing, not just enough to cut their benefits off, or cut my kids’ health insurance benefits off at the knees and make me work 3 jobs to pay the extra costs. If you’re gonna give and you can give big, give big, and may God bless you back for being a blessing from your abundance. If you’re gonna give and you can only afford little, give and may my God bless you back for being a blessing out of your own need.