Ignoring the News

So, I just sent my daughter bowling.  We’re visiting in-laws in a northern suburb of Chicago.  And so it was after taking care of some of the “wifely duties” around THIS house, people kind of are going their way – Mrs M is showering, and our hosts are doing their things, ignoring one another.  Our hosts are Mrs M’s sister and husband.  Their kids are off bowling with my dear daughter in Chicago.  Chicago.

As it happens they left the TV and the stereo playing.  I’m mixing “nana, nanana nana nana (we are young, so let’s set the world on fire)” with the TV news everyone is ignoring.  With good reason IMHO.  Sweet baby Jesus, where the fuck did I just send my daughter?!  On the TV, they just reported 61 shot, and IDK, fucking 10 or 12 dead, in old west style shootouts over the holidays in CHICAGO ILLINOIS.  And there’s still idiots on the news advocating for stricter gun control.  FUCKING IDIOTS, GUN CONTROL ONLY CONTROLS the LAW-ABIDING!!!  Oh, and in a population of approximately 2,720,546, there were ONLY 756 killed by gun violence this year, up from about 468 last year.  “about,” because some of the gun deaths might still be classified as accidental.  But seriously?

I sent my daughter out there.  She’s 16, and all I want to do is keep her safe and cook and clean for her.  My baby girl.  My son stayed home to help with the dog and play video games with one of his cousins.  Oh, all right.  To play video games with his cousin.  What am I, in denial?  All I can do is pray for her, and otherwise I’m helpless.

The damned grim-reaper statisticians say that’s “only” 0.03% of the overall population so the odds are in favor of survival.  Yeah, but that isn’t the statisticians’ baby.

I’m going to go pray, and wait for her to get back.  I hope she has fun and doesn’t even think about this kind of shit, ever ever.

And then, there was fighting in the malls, what the hell?  THAT is nothing less than domestic terrorism.  That happened in Chicago, Indianapolis, Texas, Tennessee, New Jersey…  This was organized somehow, but which social network was it? Or was it just a coincidental series of idiots?  I just don’t think so, not all at the same time.  Some asshole organizer needs to be arrested and put in stocks in the mall, and the police can fund-raise for charity selling tomatoes, various other squishy, preferably rotten, produce, and rotten eggs IN THE SHELLS.

Why in the shells?  Because like the great Mr Rickman once said in a movie he made great,”it’ll hurt more.”  And who will buy the most missiles?  Those fucking brats that attended the fight.  After the public pillory, just send him to jail and let it be known he encouraged kids to abuse other kids.  See what happens.

People are fucking idiots.  And I wish they weren’t.

Shootings?  Fighting?  The shooters don’t need coddling, nor do these shitheads at the mall.  They need a good swift kick in the ass, and some jail time.  Oh, not the shooters.  The mall fighters need to be handcuffed to their parents, and the shooters need to be sent to hell.  Except the witnesses that might have survived were law-abiding, disarmed victims, unable to defend themselves, and by the time the cops get there, all they can do is clean up the blood and cart off the meat to be incinerated.  But if the citizens were armed, there would be a lot less of this shit going on.  It would also be better if these kinds of events NEVER made it to the news, because fame, or infamy, breeds copycat bored shitheads.

Malls are not a place for your damned bored kids to drive themselves and hang out, unless they’re peaceful.  But your kids are either driving themselves or being left there while the parents are off taking a momentary break from teenage I’m bored bullshit.  Fucking idiots.  Your shitty kids need to wash your dishes and wash all the household laundry, dry it and fold it and put it the fuck away, and then study for their SATs and college admission boards.  They need to clean the bathrooms and take out the trash, and then they need to volunteer at a senior center or boys and girls club.  Or they need a job so they can learn how hard it is to earn enough to live.

Your kids better not kill my kids, or you and your kids can all go to hell.  And given the chance, if that happened, I’d be delighted to send them there while you watch, and then send you to join them.  I’m the guy who says he hopes everyone figures it out and grows a little faith in God and love like Jesus taught, but I have my limitations and I know them.  Don’t ever injure or maim or kill one of my kids, or shit’s going down.  Your shit.  I’ll hide the bodies and evidence.

Thank you, Dexter.  I don’t WANT to be a mass murderer, but if I ever need to handle just one or two, I know how to handle it.  They may catch me eventually, but I think I can delay them for a long time.

My poor daughter is so naive, we disagree on the topic of gun control.  She hates that I think everyone should have guns and learn how to use them.

She may be a naive teenager, but she’s not tramping around or hanging out unsupervised at the mall.  She’s bowling with her cousins and her uncle. Bored kids need something to do with their idle time, or we’ll just see more and more erosion of civilization perpetrated by kids who have too much money and free time on their hands.

My daughter did some volunteer work over the holiday season, and so did my son.  I may not like all of their idle time, any time they complain about boredom, but I admire their willingness to be a contributing part of making the world a better place.  I think if everyone focused on those kinds of pursuits, there might eventually be teen boredom, but I’d love to see how fucking long that shit would take to come to the surface.  My bet is it would take a very long time before the world ran out of poverty, hunger, starvation, sickness, etc.  I am sure if you look around, there is a service organization where you and or your children can serve, contribute, care, improve things.  Or they can start one, pick a pet project and run with it.  I did an internet search for just “service project,” and there were 57,700,000 results.  That’s 21 for every single damned citizen of Chicago.  More if you limit it to those who aren’t bored enough to go around shooting at people or start fighting in the fucking shopping malls.

Please show your kids how honorable that kind of behavior is- random, or planned, acts of kindness, are awesome.  That makes a parent, and a community, proud of their kids.  This other behaviour, random or planned, is just shit.  It’s worse when it’s planned misbehaviour.  And behaving like shit makes people who are only worth flushing.  When you clean that bathroom, bored teen, don’t forget the fucking bleach, toilet bowl cleaner, scrubbing bubbles…  whatever cleaner you need, I’ll provide it.  Mop the floors after you wash the mirrors, clean the sink and scrub the toilet.  Inside and out.  And hear some wisdom:  If you act like a little shit, don’t be surprised when society wants to flush your ass.

One thought on “Ignoring the News

  1. I loved this one, beautiful words with “I’ll send them to hell” included. I haven’t read enough posts about your faith, that would be nice.
    Hope you’re having a good time in your sister’s wife house.


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