What the Fuck Should I Call This Entry?
It’s not a math language dissection, but it’s linguistic. When things in English sound the same and mean different things, it’s just another reason English sucks in its’ uniquely charming way. Not like German, where everything has a label and they just invent a long word that gift-wraps and represents an entire concept. To understand German vocabulary you have to actually be educated, not like U.S. American English, where you can just fucking invent a word that is a short form to represent another type of nonsense. LOL FML ADD ADHD KMA LMFAO * #HASHTAGSSUCK BS/MS/PhD 9 420 5EVR CYA #BREXIT PXT NM IDGAF TTFN because we’re too lazy to spell out actual words, much less invent actual language.
The German language fascinates me, but I’m not angry enough or educated enough to try it. I’m teasing a little. German sounds angry because we have a historical emotional anger response to it, and because it sounds angry when someone yells in German. Germany was disenfranchised and cut off from the rest of the European economy and in their depression, and desperation, struck out at the oppressive surrounding countries. I’m not sure the barbarity of their approach, or the scapegoating, encampment and extermination of Jewish people in Europe, were justified, but they did what they did and became the demons of history. We will never “get over” Germany’s atrocities just like Japan will never “get over” the U.S. dropping bombs on their civilians and “African Americans” will never “get over” slavery or being shot in cold blood by a few bad cops and cops will never “get over” being shot by a few bad activists. We’re just spreading hatred and lies like something that looks like chocolate frosting on a cake, except it smells anything BUT like chocolate.
If you study your history, not the history books but history, listen to what they really say, the videos are available online, I know because I found one on accident while writing this blog, if the translation is accurate you’ll 1) see how our nation has failed repeatedly to learn from mistakes, or is in denial about mistakes and “diplomacy,” and therefore 2) we’re doomed to keep repeating them. In fact, listen a short while and you’ll 3) wonder why we’re not on the brink of WWIII. Or maybe we are.
If I were German, and if I were depressed and angry, I’d have started with Poland, not because I have anything against Polish people, but because they were closeby and I like their vodka. “Don’t want to trade and treaty with us, Poland? Fine, we’ll take your vodka by force.” Mmmm, that’s good vodka. Yes Poland, that’s an official endorsement brought to you by the insanely influential Deon Mumple. Your vodka is a beautiful thing. Fuck Yes. Next time I’m at the store with $40 extra, I’m buying another bottle of THAT. For endorsing you for free I hope you’ll consider sending me a bottle every other month, or one per quarter, for the rest of my life. And then, come over, bring an extra, and we’ll party in my bunker. I’ll cook. A lot.
I like Spanish, what little I remember from 30+ years ago in high school, and what little I recall from being a silly kid (mostly all the swear words), reminded, reinforced and supplemented in the modern era by watching the whole series Dexter about 10 times so far, and by a friend named Jill and her fun, sweary, honest little gem of a blog. Go on, click and subscribe. In fact, see the blogs on the right side over there? Click ANY of those, they’re all quite talented writers and poets. I follow other Spanish blogs, and blogs in other languages, and those are quite special to me too. And bloggers in other countries and cultures fucking FASCINATE me. The perspectives, the comparisons and contrasts, the humanity behind the writers, I LOVE them. READ THOSE BLOGS, readers. And study your history and philosophy so your vote and your voice can be educated. If you don’t all you can offer is your Erklärungsnot geraten, which everyone knows is just bullshit.
I like Spanish (Spanish Spanish) because their language doesn’t just ROLL off the tongue, it fucking TRILLS. No, really! And because they bring us Paella, Cochinillo asado, Pollo al ajillo, etc., etc. And I like Mexican (and Cuban, and Puerto Rican and Colombian and every other kind of not Spain-ish Spanish because they bring wonderful things to the global pitch-in as well. my sweetened Cuban Cafe con Leche, and Cuban Mix sandwiches, Chorizo y Huevos, Chilaquiles, Lechón, Pasteles, Flan, and Tres Leches fucking awesome CAKE (OMFSM! IYKWIM) etc. etc., etc., it’s all good, and then there’s RUM.
See? I don’t want us invading each others’ countries, blowing each other up, wrecking homes and families, stealing each others’ shit. I want us to share. I’ll cook, you cook, BYO and enough to share, and everybody’s fucking HAPPY. It’s what we should do, in spite of the offenses of our ancestors. We’re happy because we’re doing Freundschaftsbezeigungen the right way. The alternative makes no one happy and should leave us conscientious survivors with Kollektivschuld.
Holy shit that was one hell of a fucking rabbit trail to run down to get to this: What I was ORIGINALLY going to write about were two words that sounded the same in English but mean different things, those are called homophones. Oh, and FML, I forgot the two specific words I was going to write about. When I remember them, I’ll do another blog about that. Fucking ADD. ADD?! FML?! Fuck!!