When I was a Child

When I was a Child, 4/18/2016, Deon Mumple

When I was a child my life wasn’t carefree,
I wasn’t dumb or blind, I could clearly see,
There were things to suffer and things to endure,
I heard “Life’s a disease and death’s the only cure.”
But I had hope.

Like an arc of electricity, awakening me, to the heart,
Hope got me through life, faith made me feel smart
When I was a child I felt hope in the air,
But right now all I feel are pain, lies, and despair,
I had a dream

When I was a child I believed dreams came true,
I just knew it could happen.  I just… I just knew!
That’s only true for a fortunate few
I give up, though I’d tell you not to
Dreams made me try

It makes me more depressed to know I can’t even try,
I’m so tired of trying, I don’t want to; I can’t even cry
My heart beats a hopeless sickness, my dream’s shattered.
Tell me “no” again, God, not that I ever mattered.
You could change things.

I really believed then, that, God cared for me,
Now I only know He loves you unconditionally,
But I’m not a child any more and life’s beating me
I hurt, and I’m tired of trying so hard to believe
Now, I want proof.

It makes me a “bad” follower, being so hopeless
Once I thought God would clean up all the messes,
But life boils down to stress upon stress,
All I feel, when what I need is for God to bless, is,
I’m abandoned.

 

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