Soul Searching

Soul Searching, 1/11/2016, Deon Mumple

I’m doing some soul searching just a little at a time,
It’s all that I can handle, with some vodka and some lime,
I look at all the chaos and I want to stay in bed,
The fuckers on the news and all the shit that’s in my head,
Criminals perpetrating crime, and when they get away,
There’s no justice when “justice is served,” it’s done, no way to pay.

You can’t restore our peace of mind, heal scars, PTSD,
But if the jerks who hurt us get strung up, we’d like to see,
Oh, then there’s all of my sins- I can’t fix what I’ve broken,
I don’t have a time machine to go back in time to then,
I wonder how some people are, remembering what I’ve done,
The hurtful things I said, and then I left. How’s that undone?

If heaven forgives sins, I’ll ask forgiveness then, somehow
I still may fail, but I’ll still try to do what I can now,
I’ll open eyes on a new day, try to forgive myself
For cursing days of darkness, locked away on my own shelf.
With foolish wisdom I’ll still try, confessing I’m a fool,
With faith, the tiny mustard seed, and hope, but miniscule,

I lay aside the past and set my sights upon today,
Because there’s nothing I can do about a yesterday
I have so many dreams of this or that I’d like to do
This crippled, brilliant idiot. Don’t stop me, it’s all true.
I’d like to be rid of these handicaps, all killing me
And tell you “grace abounds” if you can find a way to see.

I’m doing some soul searching, just a little at a time,
It’s all that I can handle, with prayer, vodka, and some lime.

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