I checked my page and somewhen I found 128 followers. I managed to miss 50, missed 100. I am SO not doing this right, if I’m supposed to care about that. But I do care about all of you. You rock.
Sliding sucks, and no one in my real world helps. I cooked and of course today would be the day that one out of three dishes came out of a crap freezer bag and that was our only meat, it was freezer burnt. And Mrs M wants to tinker. It’s one of my triggers ’cause my brain says “dumbass Deon, you can’t cook worth shit, let me fix it,” so I left the kitchen and her fix didn’t fix anything. Dear daughter starts laying into Mrs M, another one of my triggers. Fuck! And I can’t say “fuck!” around the kids, so the rage has no outlet. FUCK!
So a perfectly good day is triggered to shit and I wish I had money enough to answer- “Let’s go out to eat. How about a bottle of wine?”
Tomorrow is Christmas Eve. I’ll see if I can do a better job- at cooking AND limiting my fucking triggers.
To all of you and yours I wish the happiest of Christmases just in case I don’t have time to say anything on the actual day. I’ll be fine, the stupid downward spiral is such a fun ride, and the family just makes it that much more entertaining.
At least there’s Eartha Kitt, and Mariah Carey, mmmm hmmm. My favorites.
Merry Christmas everyone! You are loved.