Christmas Bliss and The News from Craptown

I checked my page and somewhen I found 128 followers.  I managed to miss 50, missed 100.  I am SO not doing this right, if  I’m supposed to care about that.  But I do care about all of you.  You rock.

Sliding sucks, and no one in my real world helps.  I cooked and of course today would be the day that one out of three dishes came out of a crap freezer bag and that was our only meat, it was freezer burnt.  And Mrs M wants to tinker.  It’s one of my triggers ’cause my brain says “dumbass Deon, you can’t cook worth shit, let me fix it,” so I left the kitchen and her fix didn’t fix anything.  Dear daughter starts laying into Mrs M, another one of my triggers.  Fuck!  And I can’t say “fuck!” around the kids, so the rage has no outlet.  FUCK!

So a perfectly good day is triggered to shit and I wish I had money enough to answer- “Let’s go out to eat.  How about a bottle of wine?”

Tomorrow is Christmas Eve.  I’ll see if I can do a better job- at cooking AND limiting my fucking triggers.

To all of you and yours I wish the happiest of Christmases just in case I don’t have time to say anything on the actual day.  I’ll be fine, the stupid downward spiral is such a fun ride, and the family just makes it that much more entertaining.

At least there’s Eartha Kitt, and Mariah Carey, mmmm hmmm. My favorites.

Merry Christmas everyone! You are loved.

 

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3 thoughts on “Christmas Bliss and The News from Craptown

  1. No one on my end gets it, either. I realize things haven’t been so bad, yet my brain…just sees everything as evil and negative. I hate it and if sheer will changed a thing, it wouldn’t be.
    So I understand and hope you catch a break soon for your own peace of mind.
    Scary Christmas and a happy ghoul year 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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