Sorry for Gratuitous Swearing

I wrote a few blog entries and then I thought, “Oh shit! My mum would not approve of me swearing. Oh, damn, I just thought a swear. They’re nonstop. Fuck!” Anyway, sorry, swearing is just going to be a part of this blog, if you can handle it, welcome and go ahead and follow if you want, I may follow back. If you can’t handle it, well, mum would say, “thank you for stopping by.”

It’s just going to happen. Some days you just need a good swear. When he was on late at night I used to watch Craig Ferguson, and he liked a good swearing in. He swore in a chummy funny kind of way. I would love to swear all chummy and funny, but I haven’t mastered that.

All I do is swear when I get upset. I get angry, I get stressed out, I get frustrated, I feel unable to cope. Swearing is a coping mechanism. It’s a stress reliever. Sometimes it just makes me laugh when I realize I’m doing it, because it’s automatic. I can tell you there are two basic reasons why I’ll swear: Mostly it’s internal, anger directed at myself, but sometimes it’s external, anger directed at people who do irritating stupid things that piss me off. I’m sorry, mum. But it’s just going to happen.

Life is full of little irritants, like the sand at the beach when you are caught in a big wave, and it gets all in your shorts, especially when you’re at the ocean and the rug-burn is accentuated by the cold salt water.. And bigger irritants like when the boss keeps piling on the work and you already feel maxed out. I need a fucking vacation. Just me, by myself. Sorry ladies, that is if you were even remotely interested, just back the fuck off. You probably weren’t, considering how beautiful you are, but surprisingly, I just want to be left alone. But you can buy me a drink at the bar, whenever, or if ever, I go on that vacation.

Catch me when I’m not bitching about everything. Life is shitty right now. It’ll take a few days off to just start to recover. Or a few drinks. Or both. Is it the opposite of swearing to say “Thank God it’s fucking FRIDAY?”

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